the burning

fire-rider

Here’s my declaration
the unequivocal, the emphatic
blind to the path, overgrown, thorn-ridden
this way lies…?
Paradise or Hell
Heaven sent or Hades spent?

dude’s not right for you…

confess…

A fakir, hooligan, the forgotten-best forgotten

Gauntlet:  thrown, gauntlet:  run
me:
ten on one is one from none
this fight is nothing: I will not fall

Ten sleeps to heaven
an indian’s journey by painted pony
roughshod run
no kessel, no baker’s dozen

pleading ghosts for reality’s gift
good feelings, ‘cause the rock gods tell us

Denied:
my strengthened body
my sharp mind
my fiery soul

grieving for what has not been
this: my declaration
of non-independence
of consorts, paired, held close
two fragments: matched edges
dropped
feared broken: again

if the gods set you adrift
would I make my careful careless wave to you
the swell, the rise the fall of wind
mudras for safe passage.

if man had forsaken you
released to wood, hill and dale
my breath the raging forest fire
all consuming

have forgotten speech
know only flame, heat
mute declaration screaming
broken fingers sign through the blaze:

No.
this flame does not burn for you
No.
this flame will not stop

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Shooting Star

I carve a painful sonnet down the curve of her back
For a love I have never spoken, written once then erased
I can’t compete with rockstars
their faces plastered on mtvs and rolling stones
they paint a throttled picture of paradise thin as supermodels and twice as fuckable

But I know your secret heartaches, heartbreaks,
the rapid beating your heart makes
midnight calls to the receptive, the captive
bound by furtive glances, light touches
accidental and interactive

I know the places you escape to
When you feel your self crumble, feel your heart rumble
no one there for you
no one to lift you, hold you, save you

And when you’re lost
When you’re lonely
the one and only
will you phone me?

tell me lies to test me?
’cause the truth is more painful
more precious
moremoremore

Let me tell you a story, not of blind ambition
or heroics won by strength
but of struggling endurance when my strength failed me
I’ll tell you a story of being brought to my knees
stripped of any physical dignity
…and how I survived the cold winter of my soul
forcing myself to jump over my shadow
again, then again, and again

I’ll tell you a story of how I loved someone
and never spoke it
’cause the game was over before it even began
won by heroes of undeniable talent, good looks and fame
she enters a world of more of the same
and love is never best served cold

I wish I could tell you suicide poems
standing on the edge of tall building poems
– gun to mouth poems
but my will will not let me
give in to what controls me, extorts me, contorts me

How do you catch a shooting star?
close your eyes, prepare for the burn
Then burn

Lay your small hands upon my chest
Tell me: who do you love best?
count down your finger list of
the best dressed, least stressed, most caressed
Am I on this list? Do I meet the test?

I don’t fit your pretty mold
I don’t rise to your threshold
– out in the cold

I’ll tell you this much, and don’t forget, never forget:
I am a Cirque du Soleil spectacle
I would leave you wide-eyed amazed
a gasp would rise at my unveiling
and you would gratefully lay your naked body at my feet
in grateful defeat

I’ll tell you this much, and don’t forget, never forget
I am that which you lack
are you fond of what you lack?
And did you know this is about you?

How do you catch a shooting star?
best to watch from afar
but if you must, armor your heart in asbestos, kevlar and
diamond coat steel.
Flag a passing comet,
rise to the challenge
prepare for defeat
and the taste of ashes
give up before you start
sacrifice your heart
prepare for the burning
your single heart yearning
and burn.

Electra

I’m infected
virii passed thru brief contact
a sea creature staked under steel desert sky
a feeling not unlike the swift Mako’s kiss
– sudden, then lingering

You travel in packs, yet oddly solitary
a credit to your insane race
unforgettable
like the first taste of chocolate
melting on ravished lips

I wanted you
and now I simply struggle to forget
the lie I’ve forged of you
a statue rising, piercing sky
a monument to false memory
a sucker’s Las Vegas fantasy
A blue movie starring Nico, and myself
then awake, suddenly, burning of you
dreams of the cool depths forgotten
in the fevered real
before I’m plunged again

I wonder if I would be worthy
to consort with angels
…or swim with sharks
live the fantasy
…or be trapped in the waking dream
should I throw away grace
prostrate myself to my idea of you
or linger unknowing, my fate to want

I wish you resembled something more human
but then again, this less than ideal
I would not want

to be one with you
girl of the ricochet stare
blistered buckskin
maniacal laugh
a punishing kind of love

what I have is of no use to you
what gifts I bring fail to move you
worthy only of your pity
I grasp at what is mine
cut loose the rest
trying only to forget
the swinging doors of paradise

Electra

Helen of Sparta

Man, a louse

freed fair Helen
In his words:
‘unfaithful beautimous bitch’

sallied and sullied
lover Paris
wanted butch, wanted bush

Helen treed and freed
waved fare-thee-well to hideous
Man-a-louse
with regret: failed lover
turned to stone and failed
in his regret
turned to avenge
Owning that which he supposedly let go

Helen, fair Helen
Spartan warrior that she is
felled armies, felled hearts
felled her failure:
The heart of Paris
good man
good enough to fall
unable to turn
away from
the launcher of ships

Man-a-louse
cohort of thousands
dropped the
unscalable wall:
Troy, fearsome flotsam
flailed in surprise
at its taking

Man-a-louse
dropped sword
at the sight of fair Helen
disrobed before him
unable, unlike the rabble
of cutting down such perfection

‘You, are no longer mine,’ said he
‘I, was never yours,’ said she
a thousand dead heaped against the
raptus of Troy
dread decoration,
apt offering
to goddess, god and king

You, dream of happiness – fleeting
is there any other?
for tragedy: a nation gutted
for feelings: love
honor, jealousy and shame

Helen, fair Helen of Sparta
wept.

Cenotes

her eyes deep freshwater cenotes
bore fractured limestone
creosote scent, bitterness of ashes, sizzling white hot flash
the sound of brightness reeling

Your eyes in Denver’s dusk
unfathomed wallows, connect and hold
A bourgie girl in 2nd hand clothing
bold jean-covered hip outthrust, cumulus clouds part

No, I hate that place, it’s full of hipsters
The pretty eyes, the flowers of ennui

focus faces gripping skin
maneuvers with glances the movement of clouds

wang the he the he the stillpoint

one day we’ll meet under starlight
a creamy moon light casting
you: the midnight’s thrashing
she mouths: ‘veni, vidi, vici’
lunar light leans against structures, trees
blast furnace heat render ashes, brightly

Horus

Careen foe’s wreckage burn arcing cauterized sky
nurse cartilage, bone, meat: remnants of eye
brother Set banished, final cries extend through time, never fade
my loss a gain; my gain a loss

Seizure of combat:
strike and counter
attack and defend
thoughts of distant Hathor
awol, unreachable: no-reply
omniscience lost in her turning away
disapproval, illness, or?
Banish distraction
Hathor’s image rises above engrimaced face:
Set, my brother, my rival
questions of faithlessness
my brother’s priapic carnage
lay waste to what virgins this century brings

Defend against this, my weakness
take stand ‘gainst hesitancy, a pale
leap across vast shadow
erase childhood fears and momeraths
debilitating crippledom and fear

Cradle absence crater
filled with your form
foe defeated, love scorned
moon rising on your dim form
shadow draped over scarred landscape
memory of kisses, more…
echoing against adamantine canyons
enscribed with legend
myth and lore:
of conquests, roar of subjects,
angels, gods

This, this engagement
is not the stuff of legend
myth and lore
this is: your life, my life
enscribe your heroics
blood-dipped pen
writ in scars decorating
your life’s body
revealed to your lover
gone, like lovers, gone.

Escape the zoo

Search within
Find the demon that you let in

Make your desperate plans of escape
Pull a “geographic”
Explore alien landscapes

The mind virus is exploring
your interior
Confirming the view that you are inferior
Fuck that! Change it up!
If the glass is half empty – get a new cup!

Angst is not an option if yer over 30
Roll up your sleeves – time to get dirty!

Spend some coin, travel foreign lands
Eat something your taste buds don’t understand

Explore the world, travel around, take stock
Preparation is the key to good luck

Bust a move, speak a foreign tongue
Dive deep, fill up your lungs

Fix what’s ailing you, jailing you
Expand yerself, do what you do for you

Go explore it, it’s a zoo
The next animal you find might be you

Lancelot Du Lac

where the she keeps ghosts bay?

restless marauding
dull scythes: weakened flesh

armor: breached
hand: holds the spear
truncated: my own

remember: manicured nails
polished cooed asian women small stature
well being bubbles: endless depth
where is?

dark fallen
recognize: footfalls
muffled: open closing doors
fading

cut phone lines: wire less
whispers ghost: love
blows scent flowers
weaken: gentle blows
memories: armor pierced
wounds: festering
keep ‘way: ’tis contagia, voracious willful brash
lover’s voice
powers:
to darkness
to depths.

surrounding ghosts
fight shadows
hand: gone
kingdom: shattered
shield armor: pierced

stone: wet
eyes: wet
warm: in the starry night I cannot see
red or clear?
stone: cold
heart

rest

remember: happy life
remember: smiling face
mirrored mine
remember: dreaming stars
:endless possibilities
remember:  days
endless summers
:smell grass dirt
stare: clouds cumulous:
armored knights astride tall muscular white chargers
tilting: ‘gainst the wind

Athena

Saint George

What landscape this?

aftermath of aerial carpet bombing

ten years hence

grass emerges in meager patches

dragon breathing from yonder barren mound

Ghosts are at bay

my cohort embraces the warrior if not the cause

she is war’s tempest

tempered steel drawn

from hades furnace

sword is heavy

shield slides from its weight

shrugged into position by weary shoulders

what special death lies o’er the hill?

the crocodilian, or mine?

“ten years, my friend

tracked and tracked against

never brought to knee

scarred, delimbed

strung together from spares

another day to dawn”

a moment’s pause

‘tween the breath and the inbreath

living a different life

servitude, prayer, meditation

passion of heaven

the searing light of ineffable

what fearful visage reigned down

upon supplicant flesh?

then

heretic, a lifetime lost

to cultish fantasy

strapped breastplate, plated greaves

kissed loved ones goodbye

enter the fray

this, this monster: is mine

doppleganger in reptilian flesh.

bonded for a deathful conclusion,

crippled life, or less

I have tried to find paradise

in a lover’s embrace

but the dragon lay between us

in nightmares and fever dreams

reflected in mirrored pools

and burnished steel

our mirrored lips repeat “You will be the death of me”

in this, this moment of courage

I am most alone

I grieve for my widowed bride

white dress muddied and tattered

ringless

I grieve for a different life I might have led

pious, pastoral

a moment, then gone:

O’ER THE HILL!

O’ER THE HILL!

La Violación de Deianeira

1

Skin of marble, Heart of rumble

A heart divided

Thoughts: heroes fisticuffs & conquest

 

2

Kentauros smell of evergreen & anise

teenage fumblings, desiccated brain

River tumbles: inverted

monstrous deed, lazy eye leaves dreamtime

seeks my god…

 

3

Sky of fist: Kentaur down

Herakles from kilometers struck

A mighty heart then none

 

4

Throat-singing Kentauros rasps:

‘take this rouge cassis

A philandering stag to heel,

No dog man or god immune’

 

5

In the earth exhumed

This phial: the sea

Like waves returning

Your heart to mine

This tunic weaved

Of ambergris, wheat and quartz

Kentaur blood poured to

tear lover from mine

edifice breaker

Crack stone: your heart

sip at marrow forgot:

ocean’s heart engulfing

 

6

Invest robe: bronzed hoofs

Bull neck, hairless trunk

Monstrous hands

Like black raven’s wings unfurled

The future: cascading waterfall

off stony cliffs

thunderous finale to a life heroic

in the burning

an avenging flame to cleanse

humanity from inhumanity

A saddened eye through flames

Seek mine

 

7

silent commune

rolling thunder speaks: ‘this conclusion

a betrayal for a betrayal

difference:

distress for a love divided

Mine for conquests: all conquests

For you, Deianeira, three times betrayed:

kentaur, husband, self

I say this: though this ending foretold

On the point of deliverance

when this burning cup might pass

refusal for a moment with you

What burning flames I walk

I walk for you

 

Set the pyre afloat now

to a place where no shadow fall

from still waters: no face to reflect,

no body in violation

or small hands to self-betray

do not douse self

In worlds aflame

Yet: go gladly

’cause small hands conveyed’

 

8

tend to flames of memory

Though beg to follow

Into seas on fire

But live

’cause if betrayal

is all existing

Then I will

If all existing is memory

Then I will

(ref: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Deianira)
(ref: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Deianira)

 

Poetry, musings, spokenword, and more…